Like I said, our trip to Denver was pretty short, but it was great to see everyone.
I was lucky enough to spend my birthday with my husband, my friends and my family; my parents picked Josh and me up from the airport and we met my friends and my aunt and uncle at my favorite restaurant in Denver for some Mexican food and margaritas.
After dinner we all headed over to Sarah's house where we were planning to convene before hitting the bars, but once we were there we figured why not just stay in. We had bottles of champagne and played a drinking game of our own invention with a deck of Skip-Bo cards. We were all too unorganized to read the game's directions, but not too disorganized to invent a complicated set of rules for our own game that included lots of drinking, stupid human tricks and some river dancing.
Saturday was Nicki and Chips lovely wedding in Castle Rock. The wedding was beautiful and the setting was absolutely breathtaking.
Tanya was rocking a cute vintage number.
It was such a great reason to visit and see all the ladies.
It was a too short trip, that's for sure. Just enough time for dinner, breakfast, a beautiful wedding and brunch- then it was right back here to Chicago.
As if the weather gods themselves heard my pleas, Denver was snow frosted but sunny, and (though it snowed while we were gone) Chicago was the same upon our return.
The wedding was lovely, and it was, of course, wonderful to see my friends and family; but all that traveling is just plain exhausting.
Believe it or not- I was actually happy to get home sink into the couch.
Who knew the day would come when I'd gladly leave Denver for Chicago.
This morning Josh took me out to breakfast; I had a patty melt and a milkshake because, hey, it's my birthday!
I could take this time to reflect on what a life changer my 28th year was, but I really have to pack so let me just say, it was a hell of a year. Here's hoping the next one will be a little less exciting.
This afternoon we're off to Denver for a wild weekend. See you on Monday.
Despite my tremendous aversion to going "out" on work nights, when Josh got us in to see the Indigo Girls (for free! Thanks Micah!) last night, I put on my jacket and away we went.
It wasn't a concert really, it was more like a promo spot for a local radio station and they played a few songs and chatted with the host for a while. It was one of those fun, random things that I am loving about living in a city the size of Chicago. (Think of it as a trade off for the bright city lights that shine into our bedroom at night and the constant ambulance sirens...)
The show was over early, and since we were already in Boystown we decided to head over to Kit Kat and pop in to see Kami and Matt.
Well talk about Kismet- my new friends Tasneen and Mirvat (more about these fun ladies later) were there with some other girlfriends having a little girl's night out.
To recap- free performance by one of my favorite groups, catching up with old friends and new, and home by 9 to get to bed on time. Maybe I'll rethink my stance on weeknight outings...
I said last week that Josh and I are participating in Apartment Therapy's Eight-Step Cure* "to make our homes more beautiful, organized and healthy in just eight weeks."
When we moved in we painted and organized and made our apartment generally cute, but we recently realize that we were really only using about a third of our apartment, and the rest of it was kind of a dumping ground for stuff. We don't have money for new furniture or big renovations, but we do have time to finish projects around the house, get things cleaned up and figure out just what we want to do with the funky space in which we live.
We're starting a week behind schedule and since we're out of town this weekend we'll have to catch up at a later date, but before we leave Friday afternoon we are doing three major things and one little thing to get started. The first is a major deep cleaning of all the floors. It is shameful that in a house with two very shed-prone pets we don't do this more often. The second is to go around the house and make a list of all repairs and solutions. Shameful again, as many of the things I've put on my list require nothing more than a few hours and a screwdriver or a pair of pliers. The third and hardest thing for us was to take one big item and give it away.
Now I know a lot of people probably have a piece of furniture that they never use and are ready to get rid of, but for us that just isn't the case. We're poor newlyweds; we actually use ALL of our furniture. I thought about this and after a few days came to a conclusion that Josh and I both had a problem with at first.
That solution is this:
Josh and I are book hoarders. We both LOVE not just reading, but books themselves. We actually had to purchase an additional bookshelf (we already had 5!) to accommodate all of our books when we moved in together. The big problem was, storing the books didn't really open up the space we thought it would.
Solution: Last night we went though all of our books and got rid of all the ones we don't really, truly love. Don't get me wrong, we still have *so many* books, but hopefully getting rid of all this dead weight will begin to lighten up our living space and get us started creating a home we love.
*The project can be found online here, but I need to recommend the book too. Josh and I were warm about this project but not hot until I was finally reading the book and I read a passage that described Josh and me and our home to the letter. I passed it over to him and when he read it through he just started laughing. When he got home the next day the first thing he said was "Let's start doing Cure stuff." I was good timing as I was already mop in hand. The web content can instruct and give direction, but we got inspiration and motivation from the book; and that's what we really needed.
I know you must be sick to death hearing me bitch about the weather in Chicago.
Cold? Grey? Wet?
Get over it!
Well, I'm trying to get over it. In fact, Josh and I are heading to Denver this weekend to enjoy some of that glorious 75 degree weather and sunny, blue sky.
I was going to take a sewing lesson to figure out how to work my sewing machine. The getting started stuff seemed really baffling, but I thought, "I'm an engineer for goodness sake, I can figure this out."
So I settled down with the owners manual, and little by little I figured it out.
First I wound the bobbin.
Then I threaded the machine.
then I began my first project. I thought these napkins would be a great place to start. Square, flat, small and easy; perfect for a beginner.
There are four different napkins, each one a little different. My seams could be straighter, and they could certainly be more uniform, but I am entirely pleased with my handiwork.
Inspired by this photo on Now Voyager last week, I am now sporting some thick, swoopy, shortie bangs. You can see them in the next two pictures, but bear in mind that they look a lot cuter when they haven't been buried under a hard hat all day.
I need something to wear to a wedding next weekend, and after thrifting in earnest earlier this week I found the perfect thing.
This dress is so much prettier than it photographs. It's in pretty good shape, with two small tears under the arms, and I'm planning on taking it up to knee length which I think will make it look less "prom" and more appropriate for a wedding. It fits a bit tight in the waist, but it's nothing a pair of spanks and a week without salt won't fix.
I also came across this dress. I was planning on finding ONE dress for this one occasion, but I fell in love with this vibrant green fabric, and the zipper that runs down the entire length of the dress and the pockets (!!!) that I decided to buy it before I even saw the $20 price tag. I cannot wait to wear it to another wedding in October (and probably out to dinner before then).
When Josh asked me, "What exactly is a Nintendo Party?" I wasn't quite sure how to answer that question.
But a party it was...
I arrived about 45 minutes late and the party was already in full swing. Open bar, tasty snacks and lots of games; my kind of party.
I remembered playing GameBoy a long time ago, but I'd never played Nintendo DS before; I was in for a very pleasant surprise. Technology sure has come a long way. We played Mario Cart (not surprisingly I still suck at racing games), brain age, crosswords and Guitar Hero.
Guitar Hero was by far the most fun video game I've ever played, and may I remind you that Josh and I are Wii addicts. I love the different actions involved; getting the fingers right, "strumming" and even occasionally yelling "Rock On" into the microphone.
I have had Journey's Any Way You Want It stuck in my head ever since.
I spent most of the night playing a puzzle game at the table where everyone else was playing crosswords. I wish I remembered the name of the game because it was fun, and tough! I reminded me of studying for the LSAT, it required the same kind of logic.
It is such a hopeful day as it is conveniently placed in the middle of the week; half-way to the weekend. This weekend is shaping up to be another busy one. I'm going out with a new girlfriend on Saturday night to a girl's-night-out party, there will be cocktails, samples and from the looks of it, loads of women. It could be fun. It could be not fun. Either way I have plans. My own plans. With someone I didn't know before I moved here. I am being social.
Saturday Josh and I are heading to Navy Pier to the IMAX to finally see Watchmen and settle the great debate, and then Saturday night we are having dinner with a friend of mine from College who lives in Hyde Park and works at my company, but in a different department in a different building located on a different campus altogether. So I never see him.
Sometime I'd like to break out my birthday present, my new (used!) sewing machine. My first project is to be some simple curtains (no hooks or anything) to hang up inside the laundry room to finish the dark room I started last weekend. I am less than confident in my natural abilities as a master seamstress so I picked up several remnants at the fabric store in different fabric weights to practice on first. Rest assured I will share my successes as well as my failures in this endeavor into home economics.
This whole only buying used thing is working out wonderfully. I have been able to find everything I'm looking for used and at a fraction of the price of the exact same thing new. So far I haven't been disappointed with the quality of any of my used purchases, in fact, the more used "finds" I, well, find, the more exciting this experiment is. Last weekend Josh and I found 2 of the exact same lamp at the huge Salvation Army near our house. They need a good cleaning and new shades, but I love the idea of making custom shades (so easy) and having these great funky lamps in our home. I know that I'll take a lot more pride in the final product and my handiness (and thriftiness) and enjoy the fact that our living room isn't dark anymore just because we can't afford to buy a table lamp for $100+.
After falling in love with Guitar Hero at the Nintendo party I was disappointed that I couldn't find it used at the GameStop and even more disappointed that I lost an auction on EBay for one (the price just went above what I was willing to shell out for a used video game while we're trying to save money). I almost broke down and bought it new, but after lots of searching Josh found a few on Amazon that had all their parts and were about 50% less that what you'd buy new.
This is officially the last thing that I'm justifying purchasing in the name of birthday presents for myself. I mean it. For real.
This weekend was busy. So busy. I actually missed the lumbering slow pace of weekend's past- when I was complaining about being bored and lame. I guess there's no winning with me. So it was busy, but it was oh, so fun.
This weekend:
We rearranged our whole apartment. Moved the couch upstairs, moved the upstairs furniture downstairs. Now our home is completely in disarray, but today I'm starting Apartment Therapy's Spring Cure.
We began turning our bathroom and laundry room into a dark room
We had a first date with a rad couple for drinks and dinner at Duke of Perth. The beer was good, the fish and chips were delicious, but we had to wait 2 hours for a table! The hostess said it would be an hour, if we'd know it was to be 2 hours we would have gone somewhere else.
We went thrifting in our neighborhood and in Wicker Park and found three great lamps for a fraction of the price of one new lamp.
Friday night I went to Jenn and Jamie's awesome Nintendo party; open bar, delicious snacks, free Nintendo DS. Um, what else can I say, it was awesome. I went to game stop on Saturday and picked up a few used games and I've been playing ever since.
After the Nintendo Party I met Josh and Byron in Pilsen at Skylark for Molly's 30th Birthday. What a great bar. The drinks were cheap, the joint was dive-y, but not hipster-y and there was a photo booth. Good times.
At least until I woke up Sunday morning. Turns out, I can't really drink anymore without suffering a hangover of magnificent proportions. Sunday morning was spent on the couch playing Wii Mario Party 8 with Byron. Washed that down with a mediocre cheeseburger and the best milkshake I've ever had (chocolate banana from Choppers on Ashland) and Sunday was pretty much a wash. It was really all I could do to get to my 2 pm hair appointment. The tremendous effort of having my hair washed and sitting in a chair while someone cut my bangs was so much, that all OI could do after was head home for a nap. Josh and I dragged ourselves back out of the house for supper around 7, then straight back home for a movie (Iron Man on the huge TV) and finally to bed.
Warmer weather, for me, means daydreams. Normally I'd be gearing up for spring climbing, but here in Chicago, I need to find other outlets for my wandering thoughts. The whole time I was in college I'd daydream about all the things I'd do and try when I finally had a job and some money. Sadly, I don't have nearly as much money as I'd like, but a small tax refund coupled with a birthday in a few weeks gave me the excuse I was looking for to make two small purchases I've been putting of for some time.
Speaking of birthday gifts...
Lately I've been feeling very homey. I am anxiously anticipating my birthday gift (from me) a refurbished Brother sewing machine. I can't wait to get to work on some easy learn-to-sew projects. I've always hated that I can't sew, and I have no illusions of grandeur, but I'd like to be able to hem my own pants (I'm short, and now my seamstress, my mom, lives 1,000 miles away), and make some simple curtains.
Speaking of at home DIY...
I also picked up an at home silk screening kit for 50% off, at $25 this seemed like a good introductory kit. If I like it one day I'll think about buying some better frames and some more paints, but for now, it'll be fun just getting my feet wet.
I'm also looking forward to refinishing my great-great-grandmothers dresser. My parents brought it out for me last time they visited, and it is old and kind of rickety and in need of a tune-up and a face lift. With the warmer weather just around the corner I'm planning out this little project- tough to do in our wonky apartment with our little deck.
Speaking of our little deck...
I am also dreaming about a patio container garden. Maybe tomatoes, herbs and some hanging strawberries.
Speaking of fresh veggies...
I'm getting excited about the prospect of maybe joining a CSA this summer. Do any of you belong to co-ops or have any advice about good CSA's in Chicago?
As much and as often as I am frustrated in Josh's seeming disinterest in all things practical (saving money, brushing and flossing, gin gimlet moderation) I am equally and as frequently delighted by his random bouts of creativity. Especially when I am his muse.
Josh and I both love Kristen Wiig, on Saturday Night Live, and our daily conversations are peppered with Wigg impressions. It started out when we noticed that a lot of her bits looked a lot alike. At first we didn't find her impressions and skits at all entertaining, but once we started reciting them to each other, all of a sudden we started to find her bits hilarious. This one is a standout favorite. The first time we watched it we both just sort of shrugged and said "meh." Now I think it's terribly funny.
Josh and I had a nice, responsible weekend this weekend.
Well, if you discount the 10 hour Gossip Girl marathon and Josh's crippling gin-gimlet hangover on Saturday.
Despite the downpour in Chicago, I actually enjoyed the weather. It was wet, but warm enough to leave the house and walk around for a bit. On Saturday I was walking across town to meet my BIL for some chili cook-off action and it was grey, and chilly, but so nice to be outside without freezing and suffering.
After the cook-off I decided to walk home, I figured after a dozen or so bowls of chili I could use the exercise, and Josh met me halfway. We walked home together in the drizzle and I started to warm up to Chicago a bit.
It really is a lovely city- when it isn't so cold that you can't spend any time outside at all. We managed to fire up the grill Friday, Saturday and Sunday for dinner, and just that simple little thing, grilling steak (and chicken and veggies and brats) and getting some fresh air revitalized me. This weekend was a little sneak peek of how people can live here at all. Why millions of people suffer through brutal winters (and they really are as bad as they say), the promise of spring, and then summer is enough, right now, to push through these last cold grey days.
And now I'm dreaming of street festivals and beer gardens, long walks by the lake and late nights sitting on the deck...
Believe it or not, with all the financial stresses Josh and I are feeling these days, the biggest point of contention in our house is the new Watchmen movie, opening today.
One thing that drew Josh and I to each other, I think, is our unabashed love of things nerdy. I won't say all things nerdy. I will never love fonts the way he does and he will never discuss scientific and physics-related inaccuracies in prime time network television with anything like the zeal with which I do, but we do have a lot of common ground.
On our first date, when he so slyly talked me in to coming up to his apartment (where we made out with NPR on in the background) I took note of a few things. His framed vintage erotica (very cool), his three (three!) copies of my favorite book (The Time Travelers Wife), Anthony Bourdain's book No Reservations next to them, and right next to that, his paperback copy of Watchmen.
He thinks it is going to suck. In fact, he believes it is going to suck. So much so that I think he's subconsciously talked himself into hating it, whether it sucks of not. I'm just excited to see it. I'm sure I'll love it. I love any and all things comic adapted for the big screen. I loved X-Men, Superman, Spiderman, hell; I even liked Ghost Rider, Daredevil and Elektra.
As you can see, neither one of us is particularly unbiased (seriously, did you see Ghost Rider, that was a terrible movie... ).
I got about a million emails asking me about my post from Tuesday, so I decided to put it back up. I may feel better about the whole situation now that we have a plan, but I still think that feelings of hopelessness or doubt have merit; and since they were my feelings, they have a place here on my blog.
I did however delete the asshole comment, something I've never done before, because, again, it's my blog, and I don't need my blood pressure to skyrocket every time I look at it.
Proposition 8 hearing set to begin today at 9 a.m.
The California Supreme Court will hear arguments today on whether Proposition 8, the anti-gay- marriage initiative, should be upheld and if so, whether the marriages of an estimated 18,000 same-sex couples should remain valid.
Every morning I skim the headlines at CNN, The Denver Post and The Chicago Tribune while I take my coffee. I think it is a pretty sad state of affairs that none of these news outlets had headlines about the most important civil rights issue facing us today.
A few headlines from CNN include "The Upside of Moving Into Parents Basement" and "Mrs. Obama's Arms Ignite Fashion Fury." The Denver Post has headlines about day laborers and school bus radio and given top billing on the Trib's website; a name-that-book contest for Blago's yet to be written memoir.
I think this issue gets overlooked because people think it is a "gay" thing and somehow that makes it acceptable to sweep it under the rug. Imagine if this were a supreme cout decision affecting any other minority group in America...
I need 8-9 hours a night or I really can't function at work. I have to be up and out the door at 6 to get to work and Josh can sleep in a bit, wake up, walk the dog and get to work at home.
When I lived in Denver Josh would often call me at 11 (his time, 10 my time) and he'd be working, or reading, or out with his friends, and I'd be tucked into bed (with my cell, because I knew he'd call) drifting off to sleep. I can't tell you how many times I fell asleep talking to him in those early days.
This bed time disparity is more noticeable in our very cute loft apartment. Read: No doors. The first few months we lived together I tried to stay up a little late so we could go to bed together. The next few months he tried to call it a night a little early so we could go to bed together. But my bed time kept creeping earlier and earlier (now I'm lucky if I make it to 9:30) and his kept creeping later and later (I don't actually know how late he stays up).
Now we've sort of got things figured out, and let me just say thank goodness that when I'm tired I can sleep through the sounds of him working downstairs and when he's tired he can sleep through the sounds of me getting ready for work in the morning.
I go to bed at night, and the furry members of our family go with me, and by the time Josh is tired he has to wake me up or move me over because he usually finds me asleep diagonally, my feet on my side of the bed, my head on his pillow.
In the morning, no matter how early I go to sleep I invariably hit the snooze button twice. The first time the alarm goes off I say "You don't mind if I hit the snooze button? Just once, I swear."
Josh sleepily mumbles "Unhun..."
The second time I say "Just today I promise... tomorrow I'll get up right away" before hitting the snooze button for 9 more minutes of sleep.
The third time I'm up and ready and out the door before traffic gets really bad.
Last week I finally made good on my promise to actually get up the first time the alarm went off (I'd gone to bed at an embarrassingly early 9 pm) and Josh, used to our routine muttered "come back to bed..."
It is tough to write on a blog about something very personal. Strangers read the words and get a snapshot of a part of a story. A small piece of a little bit of one persons feelings at any given moment. And then people, given such little information, chime in their opinions. Serves me right, I guess, for only giving the little bit of information that I thought could convey my panic and my unexpected resentment while still keeping our private troubles private.
I'd like to whole heartedly thank those of you who left me such kind words yesterday. It really helps knowing I'm not the only non-cookie-cutter-Stepford-wife out there. That what I'm feeling is real and has merit and is worth expression.
To those of you who think I'm a selfish bitch who doesn't deserve Josh and had no problem saying so, well, I'm glad I don't know you in real life. I hope you never have to see your life from another persons perspective; or if you do that it is the kind, friendly perspective of most of the people who left me reassuring comments today. I would never wish any kind of anonymous judgment and condemnation on you.
That said, I deleted yesterdays post. I don't want to see it whenever I open up this blog, but that doesn't mean that i won't post about real concerns in the future, I just need a little break from the serious stuff.
I'm taking a blazing hot shower now and then I'm off to the mill. I hope you all have a great day.
P.S. Thank you Josh for the beautiful new design. For those of you who don't know, there are no Mountains in Chicago. Those are the mountains in Colorado. I got a few emails yesterday that indicated I needed to clear that up.
Word on the street today is that I'm not the only one with a serious case of the blahs.
After a long day of soft, steady snow yesterday and a gossip girl marathon I knew I wasn't ready for work today. I've got a pretty weird work week, but absolutely nothing on the docket today, so I decided to use one of my few and precious vacation days to stay home, bundled up watching TV and thumbing through cookbooks.
Perhaps staying home to be alone sounds like a waste of a vacation day to you, but I find great peace in solitude, and solitude is one thing that has become particularly scarce and valuable since Josh and I got married.
I feel like I need a little peace, or at least some peace of mind. We are facing some pretty steep financial challenges, challenges I was not prepared for, and hadn't imagined would be a possibility. As a result we have canceled our honeymoon trip in the spring and we are making some huge sacrifices around home. Considering that we already live a very thrifty lifestyle, I'm having a hard time with this new plan.
I know that it will all work out, but I am having a hard time adjusting to these new responsibilities. Things I was prepared for and things I was completely unprepared for as a consequence of marriage. I find myself resentful that I have to make these sacrifices for my partner, but he is my partner, and they are my sacrifices to make.
I feel selfish admitting that I even feel this way, but the truth is, I do. I feel like I worked hard and put in years of effort to get to a place in life where I wouldn't have to deal with stuff like this and I resent cleaning up someone else's mess. But. These are the decisions I have made, and the messes I signed up for.
I am worried. It weighs on me all the time now, and it is pretty much all I can think about.
Phew! I finally finished going through all the wedding photos (from friends, not our photographers, photos); I edited out all the red eyes (so many blue eyed girls...) and tagged everyone in all the photos. So now, you don't have to slog through hundreds of photos to find the ones of YOU!
